What Are You Sacraficing For "Timeless"?

We hear it all the time. That infamous word that can suck out all the fun and turn everything beige—TIMELESS. Yes, it sounds like we are “timeless” haters but that’s not entirely true. Our beef with the word is that it’s often used to diminish a client’s fantastical dreams because someone somewhere thinks it’s weird and you’ll “regret it later”. I actually feel like there is a huge difference between timeless and something you will love in 60 years.

The wedding industry uses the word timeless like it’s an elite stamp of approval and praise. I imagine someone saying “Congrats you’ve achieved a wedding aesthetic and poured countless hours and dollars into an event that no one can place to a specific decade, year or perhaps even region.” And honestly I find that to be strange … and a lie. Things that become popular and last for 1-3 years even if they’re not too quirky will be a giveaway for when the wedding was. Remember dusty pink and rose gold? At the time everyone was doing it and yes it was even incorporated into “timeless looks”. Guess what it was 2016-2018 roughly. The modern french twist or high updo with tendrils? Very clean and beautiful and by all means fits very comfortably in the lane of “bridal” but you better believe in 5 or 10 years everyone will be saying “Oh remember in 2025/2026/2027 when EVERYONE had that cute high updo with the tendrils?”. They’re not wrong, it’s not timeless. EVERYTHING has a timestamp and it’s obvious if you pay attention to trends.

So what is “timeless”? In my opinion to be truly timeless it needs to be void of any specific decade and anything popular of that decade. So if things are “trending” right now and you’re getting married next year … sorry those things are all off-limit by proxy. You could maybe achieve “timeless” if you choose things that are a smattering of various decades. Eyeliner from the 60’s, fluffy curls from the 70’s, a 1920’s beaded wardrobe and so on… oh but will that become chaotic? Possibly, but you certainly won’t call out which decade.

What I truly believe people—and by people I mean the industry making profit—means by timeless is safe & predictable. Nothing “weird”, unconventional, alternative, etc. Nothing they don’t already have a stock of product in the backroom or a wealth of knowledge about how to market to. A dress company marketing to alternative is much more challenging because alternative means so many things! But marketing to “timeless” and showing the same necklines, fabrics, cuts, etc with MINOR twists to keep it up to date (ironic) and that is something that’s market predictions can guarantee profits. “Timeless” can mean safe, predictable and not rocking the boat for those making the most money.

Now, that’s not saying you can’t love those things, incorporate them and still be yourself. This is where it gets hard though. You need to sit down with yourself for some serious self reflection and ask “Do I actually like x,y & z?” If it’s not immediately a HELL YES it’s a F*CK NO. This goes for anything timeless or trendy. When I (Ashley) got married the hairstyles that were trending, I hated and I pushed back— HARD. I ended up with a style I loved and ironically was trending a couple years ago. On the other hand I went with a mermaid cut dress and a sweetheart neckline that’s not super alternative. Our biggest controversy was no vanilla cake! GASP, I know but they had other delicious flavors ( lemon, strawberry & hummingbird). Ultimately you need to be happy regardless of what any trends or “timeless” advocates are preaching.

Anyways, you should ask yourself this of everything and there will be moments you doubt yourself because the wedding industry is large and loud. You’ve been inundated for years between Rom-Coms, celebrities, etc. Stay true to you. And I can hear the question now, “What if I regret it?”. It’s understandable to worry when you’re spending a large sum of money on something that you want to make sure you do it “right”. To that I ask you, “Does it bring you joy?” Yes? Then do it. One day even if you look back and are like “WTF was I thinking” hopefully the joy it brought you will sing through.

I personally don’t really believe in regret. I believe in present and future me giving past me grace; in living in the moment and mindset of the memory. I got married before I was in the wedding industry and yes there’s things I would do differently, but I don’t regret them. Our wedding had a lot of shells, like as cardholders and even as I type this I cringe a little. Aesthetically now I can be like WHY GIRL, but at the time some of my favorite memories were from our trips to the ocean in OBX, where we collected these shelves and dremmeled the lines into them to hold the place card and yes we still have some. So aesthetically wouldn’t current me make the same choice but do I regret it? Absolutely not!

In a world of pressure to be safe, to dim down your oddball loves, to not rock the boat—I say capsize the damn thing. Be full of flavor if that’s true to you!